The Break-Up Diet

Costumes, Cake and Confidence

• Yasmin Misner and Ilma Shahrene • Season 1 • Episode 4

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Ever wondered how a breakup could be the perfect excuse for a killer Halloween costume? With special guests Pitbull and the ever-fabulous Regina George, we kick things off by reminiscing about our wild podcast launch party. From hilarious cleanup antics to busting moves to those iconic 2000s hits, the night was a blast, thanks to our pals Estelle and Harriet. We share our cheeky "breakup diet" tactic, where buying gifts in the wrong size might just light that old flame again. Don't miss our dish on the themed cups, standout cake, and a diverse crowd that made the night one for the books.

Halloween’s not just about candy and costumes; it’s about embracing your post-breakup glow-up! Whether you're rocking a cute or bold outfit, we chat about how these choices can boost your confidence and leave an ex wondering what they missed. Laugh with us as we imagine the hilarity of running into past loves while dressed as, say, a YSL model or even Regina George herself. Single and ready to mingle, the season offers the perfect backdrop for letting go of others' perceptions and focusing on your own happiness.

But it’s not all fun and games—sometimes those club nights can turn spooky in all the wrong ways. We dive into some unsettling experiences at London’s infamous Cirque club, where drink safety is no joke. We spill the tea on why hosting a house party might be your safest bet for a memorable night. Wrapping up, we give a huge shout-out to all our listeners who've supported us thus far, reminding everyone to stay safe while having a blast this Halloween season.

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Yaz:

You are live coming in from Pitbull, mr 305, miami, new York, florida, with Miss Regina George from Mean.

Ilmz:

Girl High. Obviously, this isn't our usual attire, really.

Yaz:

You look this gorgeous all the time. Yeah, so do you, so you like think you're really pretty.

Ilmz:

You think you're really pretty? Anyway, obviously, pitbull, regina George for our Halloween episode. Let's go Buckle up bitches. This is going to get bumpy. This is the breakup diet.

Yaz:

Before we delve into Halloween, we have a lot to catch up on.

Ilmz:

yes, so we had a podcast launch party on Saturday.

Yaz:

I'm still hungover from it. I don't think I'm going to be normal for like the next five days.

Ilmz:

Yeah, I'm not going to lie. Even today I felt so bad still and I had the whole kitchen to clean up and it was disgusting.

Yaz:

Oh, I'm so sorry. Who cleaned up? Who helped you?

Ilmz:

My friend Estelle and Harriet. But every time we walked into the kitchen it smelled like pure alcohol that we would feel sick. So we had to like walk away from it and take breaks and I was just thinking why, why?

Yaz:

the mess was quite bad. I felt really bad for leaving, but also it was 3m.

Ilmz:

Yes, yeah, you know what it's actually. Having a house party is fun when it's not at your house.

Yaz:

A hundred percent because that mess, that kitchen benchtop. Yes, it looked like as if we fed an entire college of students yeah, you couldn't even put your cup down because it got lost.

Ilmz:

You didn't know which one was your cup.

Yaz:

But we had such cute cups. They were pink and it said the breakup diet yeah.

Ilmz:

And we had like photos up on the wall with lights.

Yaz:

Oh, we brought the cake back. That cake is the unofficial third co-host.

Ilmz:

Yeah, that cake has so much personality. Yeah, literally, and there was quite a few people at the end.

Yaz:

There were quite a few people at the end. There were quite a lot of boys. Yes, I didn't expect it chill out.

Ilmz:

There weren't that many boys. I feel like there were some girls too oh my god, the girls were great.

Yaz:

I love your girlfriends. Yeah, they're nice they are so fun and they're so gorgeous, like yeah, they are, and just the feedback has been really nice and quite motivating.

Ilmz:

I can't lie yeah, because we at this point we don't. We've only launched our first one, yeah so, and then we had our launch party and now we've obviously launched a few since then. I really want to get some other guests on the podcast, because I think it'd be really fun get their breakup stories how they cope.

Yaz:

Yeah, everyone else's breakup diet. We've got to share the diet around.

Ilmz:

Yeah, literally, I actually heard something really good. So, basically, how to get out of the diet. I got a tip from a mysterious person. They're trying to win back their boyfriend or girlfriend and so they have bought them a pair of shoes in the wrong size on purpose to try to like. You know, then they have to contact them again and be like oh, you got me the shoes in the wrong size, like, can we switch them? So they have to reach out. So I thought that was fun.

Ilmz:

You know how to get a sneaky way out of the diet genius so if you've been broken up with, but you want to get back in, buy your partner a gift in the wrong size and keep the receipt if you really want them, bad, you'd get them something nice in the heartbeat yeah, exactly because you can't put a price tag on love. What was your highlight of the night? Just dancing around the kitchen to all the fun old songs.

Yaz:

Like we had all the 2000 songs on the tunes were banging and the thing is I loved how everyone was playing songs that we all know, because I've been to some house parties where they play their like niche house music that not most people would know. I did make the playlist, thank you, and the dancing. Honestly, everyone's energy was so hype.

Ilmz:

Yeah, it was really fun. It was really fun. So thank you all for coming.

Yaz:

if you came, I was on full work mode. I kept on telling people guys, this is a work party, this is a client party. Make sure you're posting the cups, make sure you're tagging us. You know this is a work party, this is a client party. Make sure you're posting the cups, make sure you're tagging us. You know this is a job.

Ilmz:

Thank God for you, because I definitely wasn't on that wavelength. I was like sliding knee, sliding on the floor with the picture why that was iconic.

Yaz:

No, that was iconic. Some of the pictures that we have of you, yaz, it was just you are the breakup diet. Like you are the breakup diet, like you are queen breakup diet.

Ilmz:

I went full ratchet. I'm not gonna lie. I went full ratchet and I'm quite ashamed, but it's okay. Back to your outfit. What were you wearing again? I was wearing a really cute light pink mire dress that my boyfriend got me, which is very cute, that's so sweet.

Yaz:

What were you wearing? I was wearing this pink long sleeve maxi body contrast from asos nice. Lots of people liked your outfit, to be fair. Oh, everyone loved yours from my end as well, from my friends oh, look at us go.

Ilmz:

Yes, did you talk to anybody that was going through a breakup at the party?

Yaz:

actually yes, and they were telling me their story and, yeah, I think they're not ready for the diet.

Ilmz:

Just yet they're not ready for the diet. They're in their they're pre-hermiting stage.

Yaz:

I think they're kind of dwelling on the diet. I mean not dwelling. They are going through their emotions. It's too early for me to prescribe the diet Exactly, but they were in the best place to be. We were all about uplifting each other, all about celebrating being single, being in a relationship, being happy.

Ilmz:

I think that's what it is, yeah, being happy and not caring yeah, I think I have learned this last three days not to care it's so freeing not to care.

Yaz:

Yeah, and honestly, this is gonna sound so rogue not rogue, but the second you stop caring, your dreams genuinely start coming true.

Ilmz:

Well, let's go, especially in a job like this as a creator, because you see so much of your face yeah overthink so much because you care about people's perception you know what I just thought about as well, at the party that people came up to me and they were like happy birthday. I was like it's not my birthday. You're at a podcast launch. It's the birth of a podcast, just not the birthday. Yeah, I think we confuse people by putting candles in the cake, but we needed to, you know, create some spark I love the re-return of the cake yeah, it had to come out.

Yaz:

Genuinely. I honestly the person that makes that cake. She's never received a normal order from me. She did my divorce party cake, Then she did the breakup diet cake for the shoot, Then she did it again for the launch party. That lady will never receive a normal order from us.

Ilmz:

What is she going to get next? We need another one. Maybe we bring out the cake for every stage? I think so too. Maybe for our followers? Yeah, so if somebody goes to a breakup, we could send them a cake. The diet starts with the cake. Yeah, because we don't want the breakup diet to be about actual diets Like. You're already going through such a hard time, no need to put the actual stress on yourself. You know, one of my good friends at the party was like the breakup diet is chips, popcorn and cake, and that's what we had exactly the breakup diet is actually about eating food and scoffing our face with it.

Ilmz:

No one's actually starving ourselves no, it's only when you do go through the breakup you get a bit not hungry, but then after you get hungry and that's when you stuff your face and it's the best phase ever.

Yaz:

I'm on that phase right now. I'm not even on the diet, I'm just on my period.

Ilmz:

Oh thanks, ilma. Anyway, because we're in Halloween, I think we should give some of our listeners if they're going through a breakup and they want to impress their ex or get back at their ex, what outfits are they wearing?

Yaz:

So you're back out in the streets. What outfits are they wearing? So you're back out in the streets. Halloween, I can't lie, is the baddie. Olympics competition is high, I can't lie. Everyone looks 10 out of 10 and not in just like the sexy, slutty way, their creativity that goes behind costumes. So what angle would you go if you were like newly single? Would you be the cute, creative or slutty? Back to the street marking your spot.

Ilmz:

The inner baddie in me wants to say you know marking my spot. But the self-conscious little girl in me says no, so I'm not going to lie. I would probably be wearing something more cute, but could still be a bit cheeky. It is sexy because it's understated. I love that. That's the outfit, even like the Regina George outfit. It's hot, even though I'm not being slutty.

Yaz:

I love that. What would you do? Oh my gosh. Okay, so I had a phase. The last, like three, four halloweens has been just slutty, slutty, slutty playboy bunny christina aguilera, just the classic halloween hoe outfit. This year, I think my front lobe developed and I feel only now no, genuinely.

Yaz:

At this ripe age, it only developed, and I am a bit more self-conscious about showing too much skin, which is so annoying because I used to love dressing like a hoe, which is why I'm dressed as pitbull this year yeah, she's going from hoe to weird, genuinely hoe to the pimp pitbull I.

Ilmz:

I like the outfit, though you know you would get a. You actually would probably get more attention from men, to be fair, wearing this because they'd be like what the actual hell?

Yaz:

I feel like I'd make a lot of friends out of this.

Ilmz:

I don't know if I'd no, because you could lead it up being like I actually look good underneath and they're like oh yeah, sure.

Yaz:

And good underneath, and they're like, oh yeah, sure. And you're like, no, no, take the bald cap out. See my luscious hair, there's a lot of beauty underneath there and I think the bald cap also doubles up as a vomit bag. You, you gotta be prepared. Yes, come on.

Ilmz:

You know the way we love our tequila don't vomit in the bald cap, vomit like on the street or something come on. Well, what was your advice?

Yaz:

I think go goofy, it's more funny, it's more memorable. Because if you really think about it, if you're truly a baddie, every other day of the year you can dress slutty and hot halloween.

Ilmz:

Take the piss, be a bit goofy so you just went through a breakup and you ran into your ex on Halloween. Hadn't seen him since Bang. You're wearing a bald cap. What are you?

Yaz:

doing. Well, realistically, I would just scream at their face I'm looking crazy as it is, I may as well act crazy. Or I just go on full Mr Pitbull character and then just use Mr Worldwide Riziz on him. I might even win them back. Imagine winning your ex back with a bald cap on that is powerful that would be.

Ilmz:

That would be next level flexing. Well, you might even let him slap it, I might well, would you slap it?

Yaz:

no, why not too far?

Ilmz:

why do you think that being single and having a breakup now is actually a good time of year?

Yaz:

well, I think halloween is a catalyst for cuffing season. That's when it's the first event of cuffing season. You've got halloween, then you've got all the christmas parties, then you've got actual christmas. New year's eve, it's the start of dating season. I can't lie. If you're based in London, all the men are back from the summer holidays. It's the time to be out and Halloween marks the start of cuffing season.

Ilmz:

Yeah, it's definitely like Halloween's actually a good time to have a breakup, because, number one, you can wear an outfit that is gonna make your ex be like oh damn that's crazy, because last year I got dumped a week before Halloween and naturally I thought okay, I'm dressing up as a playboy bunny and did he? Did it get back to him no idea. Well, that's not useful, is it?

Yaz:

I know, but I just felt he probably did it?

Ilmz:

probably did, he probably saw it somewhere. He would have been stalking you.

Yaz:

So he did get back well, I am still friends with one of his friends and he'd tell me that he would ask to see my profile through his friends you see it got back.

Ilmz:

He was like damn, that girl is good looking and I've lost it perfect good, what would be your ideal costume? Um if you were going slutty this year.

Yaz:

Okay, if I was to be slutty I don't know if people would know this I'd have to insert a picture, but there's this ysl model from the 90s and she has. She's just wearing flowers like flowers here, flowers there, flowers there, and like with the white veil I think hayley bieber dressed up as her a couple of years ago like like flowers covering your bits.

Ilmz:

it's cute. Okay, fair, I'd go as um serena carpenter, sabrina Carpenter, sabrina Carpenter.

Yaz:

That'd be so hot on you.

Ilmz:

That would suit you the hair and the corset and the little like skirt or something. Yeah, she has such great fashion.

Yaz:

So fun.

Ilmz:

I've seen, actually, that I'm actually quite on trend this year because there's like Forever 21 doing a whole Mean Girls collab. I feel like Regina suits you.

Yaz:

Thanks, seriously like the outfit. Are you trying to say I'm a mean girl? I'm not saying you're a mean girl. I'm just saying you're a very smart, assertive, confident girl. Regina's the one to be in terms of confidence level yeah, for sure she's delusional because she's so confident.

Ilmz:

I think we should all learn from it yeah, we should all learn from it. Yeah, that's how should all learn from it. Yeah, that's how you should act after a breakup.

Yaz:

Just having, yeah, high self-esteem and good confidence.

Ilmz:

Because you haven't lost anything. They have the launch party was just so wholesome.

Yaz:

But I can't lie. I kind of thought that you would have had a friend for me.

Ilmz:

I'm sorry, I just don't.

Yaz:

When's that going to happen? I've always said, Yaz, if I get back into the dating scene, I'm going to need your help. We're a partnership.

Ilmz:

For a reason, I feel like we can go out and meet someone for you. You know I'll help you that way. I don't think I have any friends. I'll go through the files again and try to find one friends.

Yaz:

I'll go through the files again and try to find one. Oh my god, should we play a smash or pass with all your friends profile? No, that is too far. So my first date back this year is gonna be through yaz. This is exciting we're gonna have a full debrief about it okay.

Ilmz:

Yeah, we need to bring it on the pod.

Yaz:

How to go from heartbreak to healing, to back to the streets. I'm in the end of the healing stage and it's coughing season all the Christmas parties, all the events.

Ilmz:

I need to start meeting people yeah, do you think that you know, not blocking your ex right one that keeps coming back and stuff is good just to boost your own ego? So you don't act on anything but you keep them in the dms to hit you with some wow, you're hot. Or fire emoji it is nice.

Yaz:

I am guilty of liking male validation, especially it's from from an ex that did me wrong. It's always nice to know that I'm on their mind and and you still got it. I still got it, but will I entertain it to the point it comes out of the DM? No, just a quick little validation. Hit Anything beyond that hell?

Ilmz:

no, and also it's just going to make them want you more, and that is just great to know, isn't it?

Yaz:

You can't have me, but I'm very good looking now and I'm having my glow up To be, yeah, fresh out the breakup diet, glow up and to be untouchable is a powerful thing to feel and I think I'm on that.

Ilmz:

You're on that for sure. Yeah, I look so good. You do. I will give you that you do look so good.

Yaz:

Do you know what I mean? Okay, let's go back to the ghosts, back to the graveyard. What's the most creepiest thing your ex has done post-breakup to you?

Ilmz:

I don't know what's the creepiest thing your ex has post-done to you.

Yaz:

Are you ready for this? I'm ready.

Ilmz:

I feel like you got the story. I don't have a story on this.

Yaz:

We have to keep it completely unfiltered. You're not bleeping anything out. It's a gruesome story, oh god let's go even if I've ever told you this, holy shit, you're not cutting any of this out okay, I won't cut it okay, so my ex did the most disgusting thing.

Yaz:

It's so yeah, you can't even make this shit up. He sends a video of him wanking. What so? My friend calls me going. Hey, um, bleep, sent me a video. They don't follow each other, none of that and I'm like, oh, it's probably off him like hooking up with some girl just to like rub it into my face. Something immature like that. I expected that out of him, but why?

Ilmz:

would he send it to her anyway, had they met?

Yaz:

It's one of those weird things where when your boyfriend hates a friend of yours a lot, it just makes you think do you have a crush on her Because he would talk so much shit about that friend, calling her ugly, calling her a slut, even though she's not why, I think to compensate for the fact that he must have had a crush on her. That is the weirdest logic I've ever heard.

Ilmz:

It's a very common thing, do you hate any of my friends, mr boyfriend, who the hell do you hate?

Yaz:

Because I'm going to be listening out now.

Ilmz:

Yeah.

Yaz:

So for him to basically commit a cyber sex crime? Because that's what it is an unsolidated dick pic, nay, a video of him wanking to fucking porn. That is so outrageous, dude. We had to go to the police because it's not normal. That is not normal, it just made me. I felt sick to my stomach, I was paralyzed, I couldn't talk for an hour. Then, like had to pick myself up together, started calling all my good friends, one by one, saying hey, my ex might reach out to you.

Ilmz:

That is so weird, ilma. That's not okay, and I did not expect you to you. That is so weird, ilma. That's not okay. No, and I did not expect you to say that. And why is he dming being rude about your friend and then dming?

Yaz:

her a video yeah, of him wanking yeah, that is next level gross oh my god, I'm sorry did you see it? Yeah, she showed me the video, she screen recorded it, but she only screen recorded for like two seconds because obviously naturally when you see something so horrific you like get out of it yeah, so she got out of it really quickly. So obviously on the top of a video you can kind of see how long the video is meant to be, and it was meant to be a long video from lincoln that has really, really upset me a bit.

Ilmz:

It's really gross well happy halloween, doll like you say some gross things. But that was gross.

Yaz:

No wonder you say gross things you've been traumatized oh yeah, I'm just trying to rebrand the trauma into comedy did this happen like when you were doing well? This was when I was in australia having the summer of my life. I was fully glowing up. I was reunited with all my guy friends from uni, so a lot of my stories was with me and all my sexy australian male friends. You know how hot australian men are the abs, the height I'm gonna disagree.

Yaz:

They have mullets oh, you don't find that hot. Ew, oh, I love a mullet daddy with the mustache and everything. Oh my god, that is gross oh my god with like an eight pack and a happy trail. Yep, oh, my type right there.

Yaz:

That is so rough but like my friends weren't mullet daddy looking guys. They were really conventionally attractive men that my exes were always kind of wary of. He would always accuse me of cheating on him with them. So I spent that summer spending, you know, taking pics with them having fun, going to the beach, road trips, and that's when he popped out it's always that exes always pop up when you're thriving.

Ilmz:

What is that about? They're like need to take you down a few steps. You know. Take you down a few pegs remind you of how bad I treated you, maybe Like leave us alone.

Yaz:

I honestly kind of feel like bringing an ex out to the pod and ask them what goes through your mind.

Ilmz:

Yeah, maybe we should. Maybe we should get Mr. Get his cock out. He's going to get his cock out here we're going to get our podcast cancelled. Yeah, we're going to get banned.

Yaz:

We can't have everyone Watch this space.

Ilmz:

Guys, we might bring an ex Ilma's going to have all her exes on the show I'm just going to. I don't have any exes, but I'm going to stir the pot, yeah, okay.

Yaz:

Let's get an ex on and ask them all the questions, all the psychological reasoning behind why they pop up when we're thriving. Yeah, watch the space, there's going to be an ex, I'm ready for it. Yes, say, we're at Annabelle's Halloween party. We look insane. We run into one of your situationships from the past. What you doing? Are you trick or treating? Are you dishing out the candy or are you tricking them out?

Ilmz:

tricking them out. You had me, you lost me.

Yaz:

I'm gone we are just not entertaining these ghosts from the past. We are not entertaining these new energy. This cuffing season halloween we wipe the slate clean, we enter the baddie era. We look amazing, sexy, cute, funny. The lot out with the old, in with the new. Oh my gosh, yes, I've just realized the social calendar is going to be really busy no in cuffing season.

Ilmz:

I mean I'm already cuffed.

Yaz:

Well, you're helping me cough yeah, yeah, true, I'm on work I'm on work.

Ilmz:

Sorry, I forgot I'm helping you.

Yaz:

If anything, cuffing season is going to be more work for you because you're going to be wing womaning me. I'm on it. I'm going to be in the corner like please talk to me.

Ilmz:

You know, we've actually done that. Oh yeah, we you. You were like my birthday dinner yeah. You were like, oh, that guy's kind of cute. And I was like, okay, we got this. So our friend and I went up to him and was like our friend thinks you're cute, what's your instagram? Like a 12 year old. And he's like what's your friend obviously thinking that we're lying about it and that we just wanted to talk to him. We didn't and he was interested, but I think he was a promoter.

Yaz:

Yeah, yeah, he was like come to dear darling, and I'm like oh, oh, I got so many of you in my dms, not another one, yeah your dms are haunted by promoters holy shit. Yeah, that's the true ghost this season.

Ilmz:

It is a weird thing a promoter table, to be honest, like I get going for the free drinks and whatever, but it's a weird vibe because is anybody really having that much fun?

Yaz:

no, and I feel like I get spiked all the time yeah, it's a bit scary.

Ilmz:

I don't know that would. It freaks me out.

Yaz:

There's like this one club. Whenever I go with the promoter, I always get spiked circ is not okay.

Ilmz:

I don't care that. I'm gonna slate it, because I've been there a few times when I was younger, like three times. Only every single time you wake up with the biggest headache. It's in a dodgy area and it's not fun and it's like you get blackout.

Yaz:

It's quite scary from like two drinks yeah, I don't know what's going there, but I think there's definitely something there needs to be an investigation because it's happened to not just us, so many of my girlfriends, so many girls in London in general.

Ilmz:

I think they put something like in the air con that makes you feel a bit I don't know loopy.

Yaz:

Stuffiness, and there's so much like sensory overload.

Ilmz:

Don't go to Cirque for Halloween. It's not worth it.

Yaz:

Yeah, be safe, guys. Pink house party, to be honest.

Ilmz:

Yeah, then you can be in your little outfit and it doesn't matter.

Yaz:

And there's a bathroom. If there's any wardrobe malfunction, you can just get changed easily, safely. You're not ditching your friends for anywhere. Well guys, this is a wrap for the special edition halloween episode. Just want to shout out all our lovely friends for showing up to our launch party and also everyone else following and sending so much love and all this positive feedback on our podcast.

Ilmz:

This is just the beginning thank you so much and stay safe. Make your ex jealous and glow up.

People on this episode

Head Shot

Ilma Shahrene

Co-host
Head Shot

Yasmin Misner

Co-host