The Break-Up Diet

Tallia Storm Gets Real: “I Talk a Big Game… But I’m a Lover Girl”

• Yasmin Misner and Ilma Shahrene • Season 1 • Episode 39

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What happens when the baddie facade breaks down? Singer-songwriter Talia Storm joins us for a disarmingly honest conversation about the gap between her public persona and private desires. Known for her empowering anthems and unapologetic attitude, Talia reveals the vulnerable reality behind her confident image—she's actually yearning for genuine connection.

"I talk a big game," Talia admits, "but when I actually like someone, that wall of intimidation just shatters." This confession sparks a fascinating exploration of why so many of us hide our true desires behind carefully constructed personas. Having experienced her first serious relationship at 22 after prioritizing her career from age 13, Talia's journey mirrors many ambitious women who delay romantic development only to find themselves emotionally unprepared when heartbreak eventually arrives.

The episode delves into the contradictions of modern dating culture, where appearing invested is considered weakness and detachment is rewarded—particularly on social media. "The price you're paying to be viral is expensed by you not having human experience anymore," Talia observes, highlighting how performative relationships have trained a generation to value perception over substance. Her "Baddie Academy" tips provide practical wisdom for maintaining confidence while gradually allowing vulnerability, striking that delicate balance between strength and openness.

Perhaps most refreshing is Talia's call for normalizing emotional investment: "It's cool to care, it's cool to try." This simple yet radical statement challenges years of cultural conditioning that equates caring deeply with weakness. Her upcoming single "Ready for Love" represents this evolution, embracing vulnerability rather than running from it. As she puts it, "Nonchalant is dead"—signaling a cultural shift toward valuing genuine connection over strategic indifference.

Ready to stop pretending you don't care? Listen now, and join the conversation about embracing your authentic desires without apology. Share your thoughts with us on social media, and don't forget to subscribe for more raw, unfiltered discussions about modern relationships.

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Ilmz:

Welcome back to another episode of the Breakup Diet. Today we have a really, really sexy guest and I've kind of promised that I won't flirt with them, but she has the most amazing tits she's covered it up, though, but welcome to the episode Talia Hi guys, I am so excited to be on the pod. We're so excited to have you like. I'm like starstruck kind of.

Talia:

I'm starstruck guys. I'm like this is big and the fact that they have already got me a drink is kind of iconic and um because I'm trying to get you to stay off. I hear that, I hear that, I feel that. But, guys, it's an honor.

Yaz:

Thank you for having me no, thank you for coming on. Can we have a little bit more of an intro? So you're Talia, talia storm baby hey guys I'm talia storm.

Talia:

I'm a singer, songwriter, I'm a host, I'm an actress, I'm a. I'm all of it. I'm all of the entertainments I'm sure you've seen her.

Ilmz:

Well, her single fuck boy. Yes, you went. What you? A truck boy?

Talia:

yeah, are you a boy? No, that's low-key. One of my favourite songs of my new era, which we'll talk about later. But the best part is really that we call it A Bin here and it's fully getting rinsed for me saying garbage truck boy, but I'm like you know what? Yeah, I wrote that in LA and what.

Ilmz:

What about it?

Talia:

So you've had a lot of breakups. Yeah, I mean, my whole life is just one breakup. And it got to the point where my mom actually phoned me yesterday and she was like, okay, talia, we have to rebrand let's switch it up.

Yaz:

We've been holding back way too much. Welcome to the breakup diet like I'm I break up from what break up from everything.

Talia:

I scare them all the way no break up is the brand.

Yaz:

Let's be honest, it is the brand the entire brand.

Talia:

And I'm like mom my tiktoks are built on the fact that I tell these men to fuck off and I get a new one like but I my mom was like but you don't know you don't get a new one. You cry with the same man for like three years and I'm like, yeah, but baby, it's the brand and no one knows that, mom, yeah, no one needs to know that.

Talia:

I know, yeah, you know, I was actually thinking. The other day I started this brand in like 2021. I released a song called broken and it literally was about getting your heart broken.

Talia:

But I was like young 2021. What are we like? 20, I was literally 22 and I was time of my life and then I had my first ever like real, like situationship slash boyfriend, such whatever. This man broke my heart and then he ruined it for me because suddenly he was like you're making tiktoks about me, like all this shit, and I'm like I want to go back and hug little me because I'm like that man first of all. You know, finally, that's been your brand. He signed up to this before you. He even broke your heart and he knew that was your brand. So you know what, nowadays I'm like I'm gonna post whatever the fuck I want and I don't care what anyone thinks fair, he was just jealous, probably, he wanted to like, dim your light.

Talia:

Honestly, that's exactly what I wanted you to do yeah, and I think that's the sad part nowadays, where we're all baddies and when we eventually let down that wall and show somebody our vulnerable side, when they almost like hold the baddie against you once you've already broken down the wall, is what really hurts my feelings. I'm like, wow, I've really stripped back baddie, you've seen vulnerable, and then you're gonna slag me off for being baddie you.

Ilmz:

You liked me because of the baddie yeah but, you met me because I was at the club.

Talia:

You know what I mean and I'm like, now that I've just shown you the other side of me that nobody gets to see this is a luxury, this is a prime luxury Then you're going to turn around and be like it just makes you wonder like can men actually handle multifaceted women? No, I don't think they can. I live with my brother at the moment. My brother is 20 and single. Yeah, it was like single no ready he's like six foot four.

Talia:

He gets all these like all the women, hello and I'll be out with them. And all these like like 30 year old women come up to him like really good with them. And I'm not joking, I'm there and I'm almost like babe, I want to pull you for a chat like this man, ain't it?

Ilmz:

like this man is not it um, but I'm different talia I am dead.

Talia:

My mom's gonna watch this. This is great sorry, mom.

Ilmz:

I promise I'm a good girl. I'm one of the good ones you actually are.

Yaz:

That's a funny thing. I think you talk a big game, you talk a big game, but your action is not there oh yeah, there is no action.

Ilmz:

You know what?

Talia:

there is something in this because I talk a big game but we had a little call before this and both girls saw me crack on depression. Now this is something that happens to me when I actually like someone, that wall of like bad day, intimidation, like you're really gonna, you're really gonna mess with me, it just shatters like I'm like what, but talia, storm would be so disappointed, it's because we're nothing but girls at the end of the day.

Ilmz:

You know what we just want to be loved if I think it is all.

Yaz:

It's all the whole thing of fake it till you make it, but like also your persona, like you can be that girl 90 of the time, but there's still you could be another version, another 10 percent.

Talia:

Yeah, that's fine though I saw a quote yesterday that said it can take you up to eight years to get over a heartbreak don't say that we know that.

Yaz:

We know that from page of.

Ilmz:

Just like it takes six months, you can live in shock six weeks to live in shock, but it's the comparison that makes you think about them for nine years, eight years. So that's one thing we're not gonna do. Compare, is that something? You think about them for nine years, eight years, so that's one thing we're not going to do compare Is that something you do?

Talia:

What to like the new bitch that's replaced me?

Yaz:

That or like your ex-boy next boy. That was a good lyric that was really good.

Ilmz:

Use it.

Talia:

Put me on the feature. No, I'm very like, like will take me a good two years to get over you and like I'll. But the good thing is, because I'm a Scorpio, right, I do really well from like rising from the ashes and, as cringe as that sounds like, if something really breaks me down and like knocks me to the floor like this said heartbreak that I'm only low-key over it. Now like boom, I'm gonna prove you so wrong. I'm gonna make sure I am so out of your league by the time I'm done. I'm gonna be better. I'm gonna focus inwards like I don't.

Talia:

I'm not one of those girls that's gonna go to the club and just like find any next man. I'm just gonna make sure that, like, my money is right, my jobs are right, like I. I took my job in Scotland like when I was like peak heartbreak because I I was like you know what I'm going to show you. I'm going to be on the radio interviewing Kylie Minogue. I'm going to be living my life, I'm going to be bossing up and I feel like those moments are almost really good for me. But I definitely don't want to do it again. I'm getting older now. Like we don't, I can't, I can't be bothered.

Talia:

So that heartbreak? Can you tell us? Well, so my friends say that I am quite immature when it comes to relationships and love because I literally have no experience. Because I've been an artist, a singer, in the public eye since 13, I was so focused on being a musician, being a singer like making money and just being a business. I'm a businesswoman. So actually I never had like a teen love and I never had a teen heartbreak. And even by the time I was 21, like like I wasn't even going on dates. I wasn't even like kissing boys and everyone would be like, oh, I don't do dates. But actually it was just because I was terrified. I was now 22, I'd never had a relationship, I'd never had a boy like I was, the like I was, I was like the holy mary to all my friends and I'm like god, like now I'm actually terrified because I'm 22 and I have zero experience. So what am I gonna?

Ilmz:

do. This is like exactly us to a t is it yeah? Good, my first relationship. 22, yours as well, right 23.

Yaz:

Yeah, okay, yeah, good, okay, first boyfriend yeah, exactly same as me.

Talia:

So I'm at this stage and I'm like this is wild, because I love being in control and I love being having the power and you only have the power through experience and suddenly I have zero experience. The only thing I have on me is like I realized early on that the more I kind of scare guys and intimidate them, the more they like you. So I played on that. I played on the bad day, I played on that I don't want you. You know like I was very good at that. So by the time I was like I did, I met this guy and I like really liked him. I was like whoa, like I've not even felt these feelings ever, like was this man anything special? No, it's just because I'd never experienced these men never all right.

Talia:

But suddenly I was like slowly but surely putting my guard down, like really getting to know someone and being vulnerable and that just felt so special to me and I realized really quickly that I am a lover girl. Like I am, like Drake's, a Scorpio, so maybe, like maybe I am him. He talks a big game but at the end of the day he's just a lover guy. Do you know what I mean? Like all he wants to do is just curl on a bed and like sing heartbreak songs, like slay relatable. So, um, yeah, I just really put my guard down, my wall down. I really felt like he knew me, a version of me that nobody else knew that's easy, nice that you can put your wall down.

Yaz:

So like not easily, but you were able to, because I actually found that really hard, being 23 and then having like a first relationship. Yeah it's, I found it quite hard to let somebody in yeah.

Talia:

Well, there's also something in that, because I've realized even recently, at 26, now, when I'm only just like starting to speak to someone again, that I almost self-sabotage it and try and clarify vulnerable moments with like a, oh yeah, but x, y and z, as if I don't care, because I've noticed that I think maybe you've just got, I've just got to start going on dates personally. But that like that frightens me so much being vulnerable with someone again and then showing them the purest version of yourself and then still being like, yeah, but you're not right for me. Like that's crazy. In that moment, in that heartbreak, when you're like, wait, I don't understand, I've literally shown you the best version of me. You are on such a pedestal and like you don't want me, but like you have to experience it, like you have to go through it. Like, honestly, my advice would be to anyone younger go through it sooner the better like 100.

Ilmz:

I wish I went through mine when I was a teenager, correct?

Yaz:

correct? Yeah, I wish I did too, I just didn't have any options. You know what I mean.

Ilmz:

Like I wanted, yeah I definitely because, like the first heartbreak, if you can just get that done sooner the better correct.

Talia:

Yeah, so I lost like mad weight. I was like walking every day.

Ilmz:

I just couldn't that's the breakup diet. You lose your appetite I lost my appetite.

Yaz:

It was crazy. It's not good. But like, what is that like actually? What is that like? It's actually not good when you think about it because, like what? You're not hungry because you're so sad and depressed that's what it is. But like, why? Like, how can somebody have that power? Really do you don't want to eat bad.

Talia:

It's not fair I think we all underestimate energy as a whole, and this is something I'm trying to really tap back into, because I used to be super spiritual and super like everything's a sign and like gratitude, whereas I have fallen out of it and I think you know, being in London and big cities, it's easy to kind of get carried away, but actually you don't need another quote on Instagram to tell you the more in tune with yourself, the better your life is, because all of us are living in escapism like the same way. I'm like come on, girls, let's go get some margaritas. Like do you want me? Let do some. It's all an escape from feeling the things we're meant to feel. So my like, my challenge to myself is just like feel the things, be vulnerable. Tell the guy you like him, like say that cringy thing, like do too much.

Talia:

You know and I think this comes with being loud, bubbly people, which we both all of us are are that actually like that's okay, instead of trying to like dim it or like sarcasm, to like play as if it's all just a joke, like I do that, like I've lost count of my guys, I go oh my god, you're so funny. I'm like oh my god, look in my head that's just a coping mechanism for, like you guys, thinking I'm cool and not too much, like I'm actually just a lot, I'm a lot oh yeah, oh yeah, and I'm not ashamed to admit it like so, yeah, I I think that comes with age, though Just being like you know what I'm okay with, who I am.

Yaz:

I think as you get older, you get more sure of yourself for sure.

Ilmz:

Oh, and it's the best thing ever. Like I'm turning 30 this year and my sense of identity is at its like best. Like no one can tell me shit otherwise, yeah. Like no one can tell me shit otherwise, yeah. Like the confidence and just my boundaries. No one can cross that shit anymore. And my pickiness as well. Like I've developed standards at this big old age, which sucks, but like you got there in the end.

Talia:

Do you think that leaves you more lonely though?

Ilmz:

I'm not lonely. I'm definitely alone and it's like harder for me to open up, but I'm definitely not lonely. Yeah, I'm more fulfilled with like, with everything. I've got all these amazing friends. I keep meeting, like, new friends, like yourself, like I keep getting gravitated towards people that I have stuff in common with, like, which is why you and I like clicked immediately. You know, yeah, yeah, like I'm finding my soulmates, mates, not mate anymore, which is really nice.

Yaz:

Those are nice. You are racking off some good like quotes. I'm like listening to you like whoa yeah Inspirational.

Ilmz:

Yeah, well, that's what we want to like. Tell our listeners here, like life doesn't end after the heartbreak, after you've been like broken down, after being vulnerable with someone I'll never forget, one of my friends being like to me.

Talia:

You know, one day it does just go away, because everyone does. A heartbreak is this feeling in your stomach that you've until you have a heartbreak, you cannot even fathom that that experience exists and you're just walking around with this feeling that's not in your stomach. That's like what is this Like? You can't eat, can't nothing.

Ilmz:

And you're just so heavy and you're so fatigued.

Talia:

And then one day it's it just, it does just lift and you're okay. And then you never. You know, you don't even care about Stoke and his Instagram again.

Yaz:

And that such a powerful moment, you're like, wow, I actually don't care do you have any go-tos when you are going through a heartbreak now, like, do you know, okay, I need to cry for this many days?

Ilmz:

or I need to hit the gym, or I need to. Yeah, what's your immediate coping mechanism?

Talia:

So I put into chat GPT the other day like why am I so scared now for being vulnerable?

Yaz:

What did she say?

Talia:

Oh, she was brilliant.

Yaz:

I like that. It's a girl.

Ilmz:

Only a woman would be that helpful Chat. Gpt could never be a man. He would gatekeep the information and gaslight us.

Yaz:

Also how like organized and stuff.

Talia:

Yeah, a man could never bullet point list.

Ilmz:

I'm like serve it to me, and when you refer her to as babe, she babes you back. Yeah, yeah. So what did she say to you? She was brilliant.

Talia:

She was like it's literally like what I've said, it's she's. She said you're scared of being your true version of yourself because you're scared of getting hurt and you don't want to go deep because the deeper you go, the more hurt you're going to be. But then I saw this thing on Instagram and it was like this old man and he was like his wife passed away and he said his whole life he just lived, he lived stable, you know, never got too happy, never got too sad, because he just didn't want to be sad. And then he said there's one piece of advice I could give to any young person. It's feel the feelings, because I don't care how low you go after the high, but the high is so worth it. And if I could get my wife back, I would appreciate those moments with her and those highs 10 times more than just playing it simple. So that's something I'm really trying to work on Like, if I really like someone now and I'm really trying to give time to people and I really mean like, like, especially guys like I've low-key.

Talia:

I've gone on the first few dates with someone and I like, yeah, I like them, but this is low-key, the first time I've given anyone a chance since my heartbreak in 2022. That's insane. Like I just don't give people time, like I'm just I'm using my career as a distraction. It is hello, you know. It's like that's a coping mechanism, but actually I do just want to be a girl. I do want to be in my feminine energy. I want to be a baddie. I want to. You know, I want to be in the studio, I want to be writing these songs and then I want to go home and just be a girl.

Ilmz:

I want to just get my forehead kisses. Yeah, I do miss that.

Talia:

I just want to cuddle you I don't want to have to come here and put on a show and I think that when you are being a full-time baddie out and about and posting that on TikTok, you attract the worst type of men, guys that think that you want humbled. And the guys will come up to me and they're so rude and yeah, and just say really mean things and I'm like, oh my goodness, you think this is sexy right now. You think this is gonna turn me on. It's actually not like I am not that person. I want to be a girl. I want to be in my feminine.

Talia:

I do not want to be in my masculine energy, but I don't my and I I say this, I don't blame a man nowadays because I do think they're very confused. Even living with my brother, we're giving off these signals, we're on these podcasts going I'm a baddie, fuck him, listen to my songs. You know, fuck these, fuck boys. So then they're like okay, maybe they want to be, you know, treated with this masculine energy of like you know what cool you're a baddie, but actually that's a lie, because I don't, I don't want to be. That. That's just my coping mechanism, that's, that's our generation's coping mechanism.

Yaz:

I want you to be like okay, cool, come around, let's cuddle and watch a movie I think it's because the most popular people on like reality tv and all this sort of thing are like the men that like don't treat women that well toxicity sells toxicity is what goes viral at the end of the day.

Ilmz:

I'm sorry like, do you have like lover girl stuff popping off on your tiktok?

Yaz:

no, it's like you being a badass, like cussing off all the men, like that's why it's confusing for like all the men and stuff, because and also women, to be honest, because you think also you might want this like type of guy or type of woman, and then it's like you don't want that at all, like you just want the forehead kiss or even just like lover girls.

Ilmz:

it's like a bit cringe now to like be anti-nonchalant and actually feel like love and embrace, like that excitement of new love romance. Again it sucks Like the price you're paying to be viral is expensed by you not having human experience anymore.

Talia:

I have arrived recently at this feeling of like you know, am I really being authentic? And I go into my DMs, there'll be loads of young girls messaging me like Talia, like this has happened. What do you think? And then I'm like you know what? I've arrived here for a reason like I, from now on, I'm going to be more honest, like I am ready for love, I am ready to be vulnerable, I am ready to be like you know what this is, how I feel, and if you think that's cringe or if you think that's too much, then that's okay and I'm okay with that. But we, we don't have to pretend this is a thing and walk away, and I think that's the version of myself that I'm excited to go forward with, you know, instead of actually pretending that being a baddie and telling men to piss off every five minutes and going viral and walk, you know, getting millions of views for just, you know, being rude to men. Like, actually, I don't want to be rude.

Ilmz:

I don't, I want to cuddle. Does this mean your music? Are we steering towards a lover girl era?

Talia:

yes, yes, because I'm gaslighting myself that I am her right now, because I really just I just want to. I honestly, I just want to be. I have a boyfriend, I want to have a boyfriend and that's the first time in my life I've ever said that I have never wanted a boyfriend. I've never wanted like cute coupley stuff. Maybe it comes with eight. Like I am actually like I don't, I don't want all these blue ticks in my dms. I used to think that was so cool, like when I go out with my friends and like all these guys would just be trying to, like trying to finesse me and I used to take it as such a compliment Like oh my God, I dare you, like I dare you, I'm going to be so good at it. Like the ruder, you are to them cool, you got them, and I wish I could say men are so easy.

Ilmz:

But men are so easy when you don't care yes, the moment you care yes.

Yaz:

The moment you care.

Ilmz:

You're got to be like either super, super, like over-the-top flirtatious, or you know.

Yaz:

But I think you pretend, like I think people pretend that they don't care and then they ghost them and they're actually the ones that you're hung up on for the next six months. You know what I mean. Like as in. I think it's a facade low-key.

Ilmz:

It's cool to care. Can we normalize that?

Talia:

I want that to be the basis of this entire conversation. It's cool to care, it's cool to try. You know, even in career, even in you know whether you're in a podcast, whether you're a musician, whether you're an artist, like nowadays, it's like archive your Instagram, have three posts when your song pops off, so it's like you were that overnight sensation. Why is it uncool that I've been going since I was 13? Why is that uncool? Do you know the courage it takes for anyone to start something and go when no one's watching? Like we've all seen the video of Chapel Row performing in front of two people and I was only like two years ago, like why is it so uncool until you've made it?

Ilmz:

and then it's like it's because the come up is cringe it shouldn't be. Yeah, the come up is what makes it exciting.

Talia:

And that's something that I really want to do more of this year Be so grateful for the journey, for the experiences, for the living now, instead of so focusing on the end goal. You know, because you know what Every person that's ever made it always talks to me and they're like you know what you're going to get there. You're going to be so disappointed about like the top and I'm like, okay, fine, crazy.

Ilmz:

But like Okay, so in your dating era, how are you going to go about being like this new lover girl, but also still be a baddie Because, let's like not forget, you are one of the OG baddies in the UK. Like, you still got to be you Like we love you for you being a baddie, yep, okay.

Talia:

So baddie academy starts straight away with being I want to be a lover girl, but the game is still the game. You're still showing up as a buddy. Okay, yes, when we get there eventually date three, four, five we can show that vulnerability, but you still have to make this man nervous. So that first date is very important. Now, my mom was very strict to me when I was young. She was like if you sleep with a man, you're dead meat.

Talia:

Now, that might sound, no, it's true, that might sound, you know, harsh and that might sound like, yeah, but if I want to, female empowerment, if I want to, okay, cool, but men are physically built different. Women want connection, men want to conquer okay. So if they conquer you and you're looking for connection, you know one plus one. Don for a connection, you know one plus one. Don't make four, you know. So we need to accept that these, this is physical science, this is literally chemistry. Okay, they've got their vast depression. We need to make them nervous, we need to make them scared, we need to make them a wee bit stressed, whereas we just want a forehead kiss. We have to long this out, you know. Now the argument is the TikTok comment might go, you know.

Talia:

Now the argument is the tiktok comment might go, you know what. But you know, if you sleep on the first day, or maybe you wait to the ninth and he wanted to leave you and he get what he want, he's gonna leave you anyway. Okay, cool. But then at least you might be able to make a wee bit clearer decision of should. I want to do this for me, knowing the fact that if he leaves me after date nine, I got what I wanted. That's female empowerment. Cool, because you to. But don't do it thinking that he's going to fall in love with me because I'm going to have the best night of his life and I'm going to, you know, stare into his eyes and I'm going to do all of the Olivers, you know, no. So long game, scare him a bit, baddie, be authentic and have a drink for sure. How, be authentic and have a drink?

Ilmz:

for sure. How do you scare him? Like? My personality is scary enough luckily.

Yaz:

But how do I take it to the next level, I think? Sorry, I couldn't help myself I'm scary as well.

Talia:

I'll never forget this guy. I was like obsessed.

Ilmz:

It's like you're really intimidating and I was like that's hot the best compliment ever is for a man to be a little bit scared of you.

Talia:

So it's very simple to be intimidating for the, for the girlies out there who don't know how to be intimidating. Ie, my sister is not intimidating and I try to teach her every day. Okay, love her to pieces. She's a Pisces emotional queen. But like we need intimidation to get these men eye contact. Do you understand the power of eye contact? Now let's, let's have a trial. You're, you're looking and it's like we could be already I can feel it you get me like this is this is crazy.

Talia:

Now, like look away, like why are you not looking away?

Talia:

like we just, we won't just look away. You're not allowed to look away, you're not even allowed to do that side glance, because it's like what is she thinking? Wow, she's, she's really in this now, in a world of nobody being in anything, we're on our phones, we're getting a facetime call where you know we're texting xyz, like when you're actually in a moment. You know how crazy that is, because none of us are in anything, nothing exists, nothing means anything. So giving a man 100% of your time on a first date, on a second date, do not look at your phone. Do not walk into that restaurant on your phone looking down, because you're locally a wee bit nervous. You know, oh god, where is it? No, your phone's in that pocket. You're a baddie. You're pretending, you're faking it till you make it. Your shoulders are back. You're walking in there. Cool, you can't find him, doesn't matter, not your problem. You're looking around. You know the entire room's looking at you or he'll be there.

Yaz:

Yeah, you're looking around that restaurant.

Talia:

Cool, you see him. Then you walk over. You do not. Whatever you do this. See this whole. I'm on my phone. I'm nervous. No, they can feel that. They can sense that I'm not. I don't care. This ain't my first date. You need to impress me. I'm giving you my time. Boom now, this is just part one at body academy, because the end goal is being vulnerable, being emotional, bringing down that wall. But do not kid yourself on and thinking that you know you show up as a an emotional wreck, like way too much for a man. Like the men are very black and white, like they just need to. They just one thing at a time, okay.

Yaz:

Like they are quite like black and white, aren't? They they're just like, like food, like sex, like this. They're like someone that's nice and looks good.

Talia:

They don't want to be hassled they don't want a headache, you know, but also oh, I'll give them a headache if they deserve it. If you want a man, to fall in love with you, you need to spite the vassal person, and that can only be done through stress and giving the man a headache. So it's a very fine line of why many people get it wrong Baddie.

Ilmz:

Baddie for sure.

Talia:

One other thing that I've noticed if you stare at them intensely for 30 seconds before kissing, the deal is sealed.

Ilmz:

I really do think it is eye contact, you know For sure, everything that you do like, when you like, even reach out to touch them. Stare.

Talia:

Yeah, stare it's a lot and I think you can tell a man's authenticity by eye contact, because even a man is If he looks away.

Ilmz:

I'm sorry, you're a bitch to me. Are you that nervous?

Talia:

but sometimes you feel guilty. Right now you've got, you've got something else going on you've got a girlfriend.

Talia:

You might even have a boyfriend like you're, you know, I mean, I see where those eyes are going. You can, you can feel that energy, you know. So energy is a big part of it and that's why, at the end of the day like we kid ourselves on like, at the end of the day, every single person on this planet is just looking for love. Like we need to stop pretending we're not. We need to actually own it and be like you know what we actually all are, because there's no better feeling in this world than actually being in love. Actually, oh, my god, I'm so excited to tell my friend, I'm excited to like go and cuddle up to my best friend in the world.

Ilmz:

That's iconic humans are not meant to be alone. We're meant to be in pairs, in a group, in a village, like. I know it's bullshit.

Yaz:

I hate this new era like are you not scared now, though, because you said you had the bad heartbreak?

Talia:

I know I'm I am scared and I I didn't realize I was scared until recently, because I was only recently like crushing on someone and that's all I'm gonna title it. Okay, so, recently like crushing on someone and that's all I'm gonna title it. Okay, so I'm crushing on someone and I'm spending more and more time and I'm like I'm a robot, like I'm like he'll tell me things and I'm there listening and I'm like I'm still putting on this front of like I'm emotionless and I'm so cool and nonchalant and I'm like I am the furthest thing from nonchalant and like I have known this guy for so long and I'm like, wow, I really like you, and I go home and think about you and here I am pretending that I really just don't care like are you thinking about him right now?

Talia:

I'm always thinking about him. I'm always thinking about him. But that's crazy, but that's a me problem. This has nothing to do with him, that's fully me, because I just need to accept that like it's okay to feel things and it's okay to get your heart broken, it's okay for things to not work out 100. But I think you know nowadays it's all like we have this whole like victim mentality. It's my fault, it's my. I shouldn't have given them my time like you know what shit happens move on.

Yaz:

It's hard not to think like that, though. Like even if you get like aired or somebody, you're even texting them on a, to be fair, even if you're like texting them on a dating app and then they suddenly just not reply to you, you automatically think like oh well I would do.

Talia:

You know what I really recommend not doing too much small talk with the guy oh yeah, it's straight to a day I don't, but even like after you guys are already seeing each other. I don't really do small talk, unless there's like a you know, inside joke or something, or he's done something important. You were checking in how the thing went.

Talia:

You know, but I don't think this all like hey, beautiful good morning. I think that's very 2005, like we've all got social medias, we're already all online. That worked when we were not all online. We're already all online. Let's meet in person. Like when are we seeing each other? I think that's really when you should be chatting um, because it's it's fake news like on dating apps by the third message.

Ilmz:

If the guy hasn't asked me out, I'm like uninterested oh, correct, correct, because you're not my type.

Talia:

But the only thing is why I do stand by my long game is because if it's really easy to get a man like almost too easy where he's doing a wee bit too much for you, it's very easy for the next girl to take him from you, whereas I know that if this is taking me a good six months to get this close with this man and break his walls down too, it's going to take the next bitch six months to steal him from me now. I said this to my mom. I said this to my mom. She went nuts with me.

Talia:

She was like what do you mean? Steal him from you if he's meant for you. Nobody can steal him from you. Like my mom is like iconic. She met my dad and within seven weeks they were engaged oh, my god like, and they've been together what 28 years now.

Talia:

They're iconic soulmates. But like she's very kind of like love at first sight, boom. But I'm I'm not. I'm like we need to play this long game. Times are different now. Like unlimited baddies on this phone right now. Like how can you blame a man so honestly? Drag out as long as you can and become friends, become best friends. Like share your stories. Like I'm not asking to be soft paid, vulnerable, emotional, which I'm working on but like so you think men and women can be friends? No, they can't.

Yaz:

But my end goal is if. But surely everybody knows that, though, like as in, like no, no, like the point is no, I guess the end goal yeah, obviously you end up switching, but surely they kind of know that too, like when you're starting off, they're like oh, she likes me, so it ruins it.

Talia:

I have this one friend, okay, and this is probably within the last like five years. This I actually. He actually came right to my house in January. Now this is crazy because I, low-key, fancied him when I met but I find out really quickly that he has all these like girlfriends and that's a massive red flag to me because I'm like, oh my god, you love the fact that you have like 10 girls who, low-key, are telling their friends I'm gonna marry him one day, okay, and I said this to him. I was like you do know that every single one of those women who call and FaceTime you all the time are in love with you and do think you're gonna be the end result when they're done with all their fuckboys crazy, right? He was like, no, you're crazy. Like men and women can be friends. I'm like, no, everybody knows they cannot, right.

Talia:

And I slowly realized that like he was trying to like add me to that list of like, like the friends, and I'm like, oh my goodness, like you just want to have all of us in the back burner until you're low-key ready, because you're not ready, like you've got a lot of like work to do on yourself. And I can see that he was a Scorpio too. I'm a Scorpio and I'm a Scorpio, and it was kind of iconic Anyway. So I saw him like a year later and I had this new girlfriend and I was like, oh, this is crazy. Like didn't even post from Valentine's Day. I'm like thinking like, oh my goodness, and you've still got all these other girls. If I have a man and we're a girlfriend, boyfriend, if you think for a minute he's FaceTiming one.

Talia:

That's crazy. Then you're lying to yourself because you obviously don't like me that much. So when a guy ever gives you grief about what do you mean? I can't have all these friends.

Ilmz:

You ain't the one, honey yeah, you ain't the one, and that's how you uphold your boundaries, yeah so, like with all your songs and like your kind of social media, your your brand, right?

Yaz:

you're all, like you know, baddie, fuck man, all this type of thing. Yeah, but is that, like you said earlier, wasn't really you now? Yeah, what? What is you now?

Talia:

I was definitely running from how I really felt because, as a Scorpio, my feelings are a lot. I have decided that I am going to be that obsessive, possessive girlfriend when I get there one day, and that is okay. And third, as my mom says, there's a top for every bottle, but there is like we all have that someone who's gonna be okay with your level of, like, cringe cycle. Whatever it is my new era, I'm gonna be embracing having feelings and owning the fact that I am ready to fall in love and I am ready for love.

Talia:

And, on that note, my next single is called ready for love which is looking scary, because I'm like, oh my god, I'm really like telling the world I'm a lover girl. Yeah, I am I am.

Yaz:

That's nice though you're putting it out there. Yeah, just in time for hot girl summer.

Ilmz:

Let's change the narrative fuck being baddies in the summer. Let's be lover girls this summer correct.

Talia:

Baddies have feelings. You know, last year was all about city girls. Summer I saw every you everywhere city girls up.

Yaz:

Fuck this love of girls up love it goes up like to start a romance in summer, would it's actually the best, because you're like, you're like it's so like everything's nicer do you know what the real win is in summer?

Talia:

not all those baddies and mykonos dancing on the tables with all their ballers. The baller and the baller's girlfriend who are on that mykonos trip, who have their own villa and like, will meet up with the group and then go for a nice dinner. They won, okay. And if y'all can't see that, then get out of here, book a flight home, because that is what everybody wants. You know, it's cool. It's cool to love. That's what we're rebranding.

Ilmz:

I love that but, is that why you're running away to LA?

Talia:

Yeah, just gonna start my new life. Like honestly, I always say, if you're scared, that's when you need to jump. So just jump. And I'm scared, I'm low-key scared because I have no idea what's coming next, but you cannot break something that's meant for you. So there's really no wrong move you can do if you're being your true, authentic self, and I really no wrong move you can do if you're being your true, authentic self and um.

Ilmz:

I'm running away to los angeles, so inspiring very inspiring.

Talia:

I think it's a lie that we're ever ready.

Yaz:

No one is ever ready no, like yeah, I don't think so either. I think you just gotta go for it and then, if it flops, you rebrand, go go my mom said this the other day.

Talia:

She was like what is a flop? She was like actually what? What is a flop? You paid your own way, not a flop, you're able to afford to be there. So I think it's about rebranding these moments and being like. You know what I am proud of myself and I have got myself here and tapping into that more tapping into gratitude more.

Talia:

That's what's up yeah, and I think it's a very british thing to be self-deprecating. I always dampen down my stories with like oh yeah, but you know, I feel like I'm not where I'm meant to be right, but that's ungrateful. Self-deprecation is actually ungrateful, you know, it's actually like you know what I did, do that and I'm so grateful that happened. I am the luckiest bitch alive that all these blessings happen. And when we tell stories, stop, stop putting yourself down, stop trying to be funny, stop trying to be the butt of the joke because you don't want to be too much.

Ilmz:

be too much, be too much, fall in love. We're not being nonchalant this year. Nonchalant is dead correct.

Yaz:

That's a nice way to end it like that was good.

Talia:

Thank you so much. Bye.

People on this episode

Head Shot

Ilma Shahrene

Co-host
Head Shot

Yasmin Misner

Co-host
Head Shot

Talia Storm

Guest